Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Everything Tony Vitello said about Tennessee's loss to Arkansas in opener of super regional - 247Sports

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Israel says Iran was racing toward a bomb. US intelligence says it was years away - CNN

I actually pay taxes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

New Ubisoft Game Shutting Down Permanently in 48 Hours - ComicBook.com

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Oregon State leaves no doubt, outslug Florida State to reach College World Series - OregonLive.com

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Can you explain the difference between “mi piace” and “mi piacciono” in Italian?

I don’t buy bullshit

I can count

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

The Universe's Largest Map Has Arrived, And You Can Stargaze Like Never Before - ScienceAlert

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

NASA to silence Voyager's social media accounts - theregister.com

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

MindsEye Developer Build A Rocket Boy Begins Layoff Process Amid Disastrous Launch, Studio Sources Say - IGN

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand how hurricane paths work

Kristopher Mohamed needs help to fund cancer fight - Trinidad and Tobago Newsday

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have a reading level above third grade

Is it common for people to fall in love with someone else while still married? If so, why do they choose to stay in their marriage?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for fakery

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Are there any more 'nun' jokes?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Rory McIlroy Says He Shot 81 at Oakmont Last Week - Sports Illustrated

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Law & Order: Organized Crime Recap: After a Death in the Family, Will Stabler Turn to the Dark Side? - TVLine

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I can read

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Relativistic jet detected in active galaxy Markarian 110 - Phys.org

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

What is the most heartbreaking or sad love story that you ever had (experienced)?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t cotton to rapists

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I see through liars

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight